If you are considering adoption, you may encounter a wide range of information and perspectives from family, friends, and trusted professional resources. That makes it particularly tough to sort through the noise when you are already stressed about your pregnancy decision.
So, let’s clarify the issue.
Myth: Birth mothers have no rights
You may worry that choosing adoption means handing your baby over to strangers and having no say in what happens next. However, you can often help choose the adoptive family and make decisions about the type of adoption that feels right for you. You may read about prospective families, ask questions and decide on which family you want your child to go to. Additionally, birth parents’ rights are secured by state and federal laws, including the right to change your mind before legal consent is finalized.
Depending on the type of adoption you choose, you may be able to stay involved throughout the process. Choosing adoption does not mean you have no voice in the decisions being made.
Myth: Open adoption is rare
In fact, most infant adoptions today involve some level of openness, meaning the birth mother and adoptive parents stay in touch. This can range from exchanging letters and photos to in-person visits, depending on what you and the adoptive family agree to. Closed adoptions used to be standard practice, but these standards have changed.
If staying in some form of contact with your child matters to you, that option is on the table.
Myth: The child will not forgive you
The research says otherwise. Adopted children overwhelmingly do well, and a large-scale review in Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review found that most adopted children are well-adjusted and form secure attachments. Many adopted individuals contact their birth mothers and express their appreciation toward them.
Children brought up in a family that has provided them with stability will eventually understand what this decision entails, especially if they have information about it.
Myth: The birth family should cover the expenses incurred during the adoption process
In reality, the adoptive family covers the costs of the adoption process. In many states, the adoptive family or agency can also help with pregnancy-related medical costs, housing, and counseling, within the limits state law allows. The birth family should not expect a bill.
If finances have been bothering you, this fear can be set aside.
Myth: Women opting for adoption do not love their child
This is likely the biggest misconception one can hear. Adoption is a decision made out of love for the child. This does not mean giving up on one’s child but simply acknowledging the fact that someone else will be better able to take proper care of the baby.
Many women who explore their pregnancy options discover that their views on adoption differ from the truth, hence the importance of knowing the facts before jumping to conclusions.
Want to talk it through?
We provide free services that include help and guidance on adoption-related matters. If you’re weighing your options, a client advocate can help you talk it through without pressure. You don’t need to have everything figured out before you come in, as most women don’t.
If you have any questions on the topic, feel free to reach out to GMPC Medical at (706) 745-0051. Our center is located at 136 Hospital Dr., Ste A, Blairsville, GA 30512 and is open Tuesday through Thursday, 9am to 5pm. If you need help outside those hours, our 24/7 nurse line is available at (706) 403-1017.